Couples Therapy

First session what to expect

Safety First

My main intention right from the very first session is to provide you with a safe space where reconnection with each other becomes possible. If this is your first therapy session you will probably be feeling a little bit anxious. This is really normal and most of us feel this way when embarking on something new. Helping you relax is an important part of the initial phase of the session. I love seeing the difference between clients when they arrive and when they leave. They are usually surprised to discover how much they enjoyed the first session and to discover that it really wasn't that scary.

Imago Relationship Therapy

I work with the Imago Relationship Therapy model.

This model is the most effective therapy model I have come across to bring about lasting change. Its focus is on facilitating a process where you will experience deeper and deeper levels of connection with each other. Discovering Imago was a life changer for me and it is my great joy to witness its magic over and over again with my clients.

he theory behind Imago Relationship Therapy is based in the latest studies in neuroscience. New neural pathways are forged through engaging in the exercises and practices that you will be introduced to from the very first session.

The Imago Room Set Up

In an Imago relationship session you will be asked at some point to turn your chair so that you are facing each other and not the therapist.

This may seem a little confronting initially but you will discover that it will:

• fast track the reconnection,
• unearth the places of 'stuckness', and
• help identify the reactive patterns and triggers that are present in your relationship.

My role is to facilitate a process. See me as your coach honing your skills, introducing tools and guiding you towards connection and deeper understandings of each other.

First Session

The first session's focus will be on returning you to a time where you felt close and connected to each other.

You will engage is an appreciation exercise and come to understand the neuroscience behind appreciations and gratitude and why they must become an integral part of your relationship.

Lots of educative information about relationships will be intertwined with the practical exercises you will be engaging in.

The first session lays the foundation for all future work. Like building a house if you want it to last, be strong and not be blown over by the first storm that appears you must first lay down strong foundations.

The issues that brought you to counselling will not be ignored but will be addressed when the pathway of communication has been opened up between you and it becomes safe to address them.

 

Dialogue

This pathway is found through learning to 'dialogue', the central process of Imago Relationship Therapy. The Dialogue is a powerful, effective common sense communication skill that focuses on rebuilding trust and safety. Once this is established reconnection then becomes possible. You will be introduced to this important Imago process in the very first exercise.

One of the first things most couples discover when they begin therapy is that they aren’t really listening to each other. Learning to truly listen and then experience being fully heard is the aim of the Dialogue Process. It is when we are willing to show up for each other in this way that change becomes possible.

Mindfulness

The Imago model sits beautifully with my work in mindfulness.

Mindfulness enriches and enhances our lives as we learn to live consciously in the 'here and now' while Imago transforms relationships in the same way by teaching us how to bring more consciousness and awareness to our relationships.

Stay or Go?

Not all relationships are meant to be saved and Imago is as equally powerful in helping couples separate with dignity and compassion as it is in bringing them together. Engaging in this work will bring clarity and you will have the peace of mind knowing you have turned over all stones before making a life changing decision.

Don't give up without giving Imago a go.

In the first session you will be asked what you hope to gain from our work together. In this way the agenda of our work will become clear. All it takes is two people wanting things to change and be different for this process to work.

All of us deserve to be in great relationships and investing in your relationship is one of the wisest investments you will ever make. When our relationships are working it ripples down and positively impacts all areas of our life.